You know that feeling when nuttin seems to be done? Yar... that's today. Did... nuttin... except RO. Word of warning. DO NOT RO. It's bloody addictive. A game which can literally suck the time away... and life... very very addictive. It's cute, funny, interesting and very interactive. Dangerous stuff online games are. You've been warned.

woohoo!! lookee here!!!! it's 6am....... my how time passes when ur killing zombie orcs.

Wat is confidence? Wat does feeling good actually mean? Or feeling beautiful for that matter?

Does it matter?

Confidence is a fickle thing. It's wat drives us to do wat we wanna do. It's wat keeps us from depression. Im serious here. It's our fren, and our enemy at the same time. Confidence when appropriate is good. Too much at inopportune moments. No no.

And yes, I'm gorgeous. And my wit... and my roguishly good looks. Who can resist?

Ams... HUGS!!!!!!! Han is funny and you and shan were gorgeous (I so love that word... it rrrrrrolls off the tongue) Next time better place thanks... or buy me food first heh. Say it with me... GORGEOUS......

Nabz... am sorry yar? Dun take things I write, esp rantings, to heart. I dun really mean them. Well, I do at that time... then they all fade awaaaaay.



it's so damn beautiful

am so tired today. i dunno why. kept on sleeping. but i did some work. downloaded some songs. good songs btw. and read fables. good comic btw. and had oysters. good oysters. so good.

muz be the rain.

and i like puppies. so good. and cute.

Ok... im quite annoyed. Very in fact. I know you pple mean well. I know you pple love me and support me in all I do... in spirit.
Here's the story. I didnt get a wink of sleep the night b4 (Friday night, Sat morning) and got out of bed at 430am to go. I woke my frens (those that supported me in real flesh and dedication and what is commonly known as camaraderie) and we left the place at about 530am. Note that the sun has not risen yet. Yes, it is the wee hours of morning. We reached Melbourne Park at 6am and it was about 8 degrees celcius (I checked) and it was raining. And when we reached there. The queue was full. The Queue Was Full. Meaning, there would be no more auditions. Meaning, there were over a thousand pple there ALREADY. These pple CAMPED OVERNIGHT. So what could we do? We went home. We were told to come back at 11pm to LINE UP.
So I said FUCK IT. Line up in the cold and rain for 2 minutes of fame when I dun even wanna be an idol and let music studios boss me around is not for me.

And I come back n all these pple, all these frens come up to me (electronically or R.L.) and ask how did I do? Did I go kill myself after enduring harsh criticisms? They have told all their frens and their fren's frens about me and expect me to be the next William Hung, whose excellent rendition of R.Kelly's "I believe I can fly" is guranteed to make your ears bleed, and they tell me how much they would support me. Not included are the sniggers and the proclamations of foolishness I embody when my back is turned. That sort of pisses me off... a little. So I tell them, "They (security) turned me away." Then they (frens, electronically and R.L. of course) say "Go line up again you QUITTER, you TWERP, you LOSER." Not in those exact words, we do live in a polite society. And I explain. I tell them there is no point in camping overnight, losing sleep to make a tired performance to pple who are on a time limit. They call those excuses and call me a quitter and tsk tsked me and told me stories of foolishness and how I've let them down.

I HAVE NUTTIN TO DO WITH YOU ALL. I SING FOR MYSELF. I SING FOR MY AUDIENCE. I ask them if they wanna join me in lining up cause I was considering it. And they scoff and say they are not free, too cold and that they value their sleep. They will support me though. They'll call everyday. Whee. I DO NOT SING FOR YOU ALL. OR YOUR FRENS.

To the frens who did go with me. I thank you for the bottom of my heart, I thank you for the support, the real support, those that come from being frens and when frenship bonds are stronger than fucking selfishness. Fuck spirit. But yes, thanks. Waste of time i know, but hey, I paid for taxi fare :) All $12 in all.

I dun think I will like pple this week. Puppies are cuter.

To those who support me...
am sorry...

i really am

im a quitter....damn it