Back then
She knew him from so long ago. Those eyes. They shone green last time they met. They were still the same. From so long ago. His black hair was long now. It was short before, she used to tease him about it. She even told him to leave it long. It would suit him. He had laughed and waved her off. They were like that. Friends. Back then.
She remembered that face. It was all pimply and scarred. He hated that face. She didn't. It's different now. His features were more delicate now. A hint of a beard highlighted the chin. He was growing a beard? Cute. She smiled. She used to love rubbing her fingers across it, that feel, that smooth feel, warmth tingling through her fingers into her. Used to. They were more than friends.
Long ago they held hands. They were together most of the time anyways. It was natural. Everything became natural. That was what went wrong. In the rain, drops of water cascading down his short, black hair. Was he crying? She never could tell. All she knew was that she didn't want that familiarity gone. She had found somebody special. She thought she had. She didn't know, didn't want bad things to happen. She didn't know! She didn't want to leave. She didn't know.
The phone call was a surprise. He had gotten the number off a mutual friend. When she picked up the receiver, and heard the voice come through, her heart skipped. She knew who it was. She knew what it meant, or more like she had hoped for a certain meaning.
"I want to see you again."
And there she was, waiting on a bench in the park. It was cold. It was windy. They were meeting at 2pm. It was time. She glanced furtively around, hoping for a glimpse of him, that familiar sight that would take her back, back into time when it didn't matter. When nothing mattered, not even love. Love was not a factor. It was just 'being'. Existing for each other. It was 'them'.
She rubbed her hands for a little warmth and looked around again. A deep voice came from behind her. She was startled and turned around, seeing this figure, seeing
him. Familiarity ensued, yet held her back from being overly emotional. She wanted to see him. So wanted to be with him. But she couldn't. She wanted to be the one to jump into his arms, to
be with him. She wanted to run her hands through his hair, feel his skin again, gaze into those eyes and wonder what he is thinking about. But she could not.
Then, he reached his hand out to her.
"Wanna grab some coffee? Put some heat into those hands of yours?" And as if a shy afterthought, he said nervously,
"I missed you."
She knew then that it was okay. Nothing had changed and everything had. They were still connected, yet apart, in different lives.
But it was okay.
She did what she had done before, what she had always done before, long ago. She smiled, and took his hand. They walked hand in hand through the park, to a place where they would recount their lives, their separate lives, and yet be with each other.
Friends, like back then.
Song now: Mast in the mist (Yoko Kanno)
Quote of the post: "Derek and his dishes...." - PEP
god that sucked
